Posted by: Dr. Justin D'Arienzo, Psy.D., ABPP
Divorce is a stressful life event with many different complex pieces. Divorce might result in conflict between you and your co-parent. First, One of the best ways to fix conflict with problematic people is to set boundaries. You probably do not have the power to fix your co-parents problematic behavior. If you were able to fix your co-parent’s problematic behavior, then you might not be in the situation that you are in now. You are only responsible for your own behavior. The only person you can change is yourself. You need to set boundaries with the problematic people in your life. D’Arienzo Psychology knows how stressful getting a divorce might be. Our High-Conflict Co-Parenting Course goes over boundaries in Section 6 of the program.
Conflict can often stem from one parent trying to change the other parent’s behavior. You must find a way to cope if your co-parent will not change what you might want them to change. This section will walk you through whether you should set a boundary or if you should just cope. A boundary is a decision that you make about what you will not tolerate or allow. Boundaries are the first step to coping with an experiences. It allows you to reflect on the situation rather than placing blame on the other parent. No longer will you act irrationally because you will now have a plan in place when problematic behavior comes up.
It is important to remember that change will take time. When we attempt to alter their behavior through setting boundaries, we might notice an extinction burst in the other parent’s behavior. An extinction burst is a sharp increase in unwanted behavior. They might rebel and pushback when you start to set boundaries. Try to remain steadfast in keeping these boundaries. Over time, their behavior might start to slow down.
Our High Conflict Co-Parenting Course will help you navigate this difficult time with your co-parent. It will help you solve conflict and set boundaries with your co-parent. Our national Clinical and Forensic Psychologist developed this High Conflict Co-parenting Course. For $49.99, you will receive immediate access to our Eight Hour High Conflict Divorce Course. After completing the quiz, a certificate will automatically be emailed to you.